#AudioMo Day 12: Go Out With a Bang

This quote has been with me for a long time. In my youth, adventure was my north star. I shunned the mundane. I hated the idea of living an ordinary life, doing ordinary things with ordinary people. I joined the military because as the recruitment poster said, “It’s not just a job, it’s an adventure.” 

Post military, I continued my pursuit of adventure - jumping out of airplanes, rock climbing, mountain climbing, racing down mountains at break-neck speeds on a mountain bike, canoeing, adventure traveling, you name it, I was doing it. I became a thrill-seeking adrenaline junkie. And life was good.

At some point, domestic life caught up with me - wife, kids, corporate job. The raging flames of adventure settled down into a smoldering fire on the verge of going out. Over the past decade, I’ve settled into my role as a domesticated primate. I do interesting things. I get a bit of excitement from time to time, but no BIG adventures, no extreme uncertainty with death as a real possibility. I haven’t put my life on the line in ages. I haven’t felt that rush of adrenaline and extreme focus that comes with knowing that one small mistake, one lapse in concentration, could cost me my life.

Normal people my age are thinking about retirement or buying that little cottage somewhere in the country where they can settle into old age comfortably and peacefully, entertain the grandkids from time to time, and tranquilly wait for death to come calling.

Me, I’m hearing Dylan Thomas whispering in my ear:

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And I’m thinking how can I turn up the heat and go out with bang instead of a whimper.